Cleansing Stream

Many of my poems are about my addictions, anxiety, and other manifestations of emotional pain in my life. I recently finished going through the Cleansing Stream program, and it has helped me a lot. Cleansing Stream is a series of classes accompanied by prayer that helps people overcome emotional pain. I really recommend it. If interested, click this link to learn more: https://www.cleansingstream.org/

*Draw Near exists to glorify God and help others draw near to Christ by providing forever free ebooks.

Dealing With Anger

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James 1:19-20 states we should be “slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.” Yet, sometimes it just feels like a reflex. It seems like there is nothing we can do about this wild emotion rising up in us. Anger builds in us and we either explode or stuff it down in our heart somewhere. If you think you have successfully stuffed it away, you’re wrong! Your anger takes a toll on your face and in your body. It’s like trying to hold back a tidal wave. You will either explode uncontrollably later or become bitter or resentful.

One way we can deal with anger is to refuse to become angry by forgiving immediately and taking personal responsibility for our part in the situation. Secondly, we can quickly switch our focus from anger to problem resolution. Another great way to manage anger is to express anger through exercise and art regularly. This blog explores each of those ways to manage anger.

PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY

One of the best ways for a person to control their anger is to take personal responsibility. Personal responsibility means accepting our part of the blame for the situation. When we feel anger, this might require a quick prayer and some soul searching. After thinking a few minutes, we can usually find some way we contributed to the event that is angering us. Once we realize we are also to blame, we can a quickly confess and apologize to any other person that is involved. Anger has no time to take root.

Sometimes we simply do not play any part in the blame for a situation that has the potential to anger us. When this happens, it’s just best to look for a way to be thankful like saying, “At least it wasn’t worse.” We can also take heart in remembering God uses our situations for His purpose (although we may not be able to see it). He promises to work them for your good in Romans 8:28. It is always within our power to choose a positive perspective.

REFOCUS

Ephesians 4:26 states, “’In your anger do not sin’: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry… “ One way to avoid letting the sun go down on our anger is to shift our focus away from our angry feelings. We move the focus FROM our feelings TO our mind when we try to solve the conflict instead of arguing about it. Ask yourself, “How can we solve this disagreement?”

Communication is the best way to resolve conflicts with other people. Ask them in a calm way why they did what they did. Try to gain some understanding of their point of view. Ask them how they feel and tell them how you feel. Can you find a solution through compromise? Can you assign times, chores, or routines? Can you avoid the situation altogether? If you humble yourself and put the other person first, will this solve the problem? Brainstorm and work together to try to figure out how you can prevent the situation from happening again. Your relationship and peace of mind is worth the effort it takes to solve issues. Ask God to help you come up with solutions. He will honor your prayer when He sees you are serious about sheathing the sword of your anger. God cares about you and wants to give you the tools to solve conflicts.

Sometimes relationships become more about winning than actual arguments. If that is the case, maybe you both need more healthy competition in your lives. Stop arguing and join a bowling league! Ideally you two (you and your coworker, spouse, brother, etc.) could join a team together. If not, just join one yourself.

Above all, pray for a solution to recurring conflicts. Is your anger a problem in your life? Ask God to deliver you from your own anger in prayer. Our God delivers us from anger and restores joy. This is how we draw nearer to God.

EXERCISE & ART

We know that when one man punches another, he is expressing his anger. But what if the same man punches a volleyball across the net instead? Isn’t he still expressing his anger but in a more productive way? The human body was meant for physical activity. The expression of anger is just one more reason to squeeze about 20 minutes into your daily routine. You do not need a gym membership or treadmill. Click here for free workout videos designed for men and women to do at home. (Kinda like having your own personal trainer.)

Alternative ways to express anger would be to write in a journal or to dream up some creative fiction. Even drawing and painting can express anger. The quality of your art piece is not as important as the expression of your emotion–the download from your heart and soul.

Lord, We confess our sinfulness and unrighteous anger to You. Please help us to become angry less and deal with the anger inside of us in healthy ways. Thank You that You have the power to deliver us, the desire to deliver us, and great wisdom in all things.In Christ’s Name, Amen.

Consider anger you have held onto for a long time. When the sun goes down on your life, will you still be angry at those people? Fast forward to thoughts of you laying on your death bed. Will you regret all the time you wasted being angry? Will you mourn the relationships wounded by your anger? What should you have done with your time? Click here to ponder this with me in a poem called “From My Death Bed.”

© 2015 Kim Bond

Draw Near exists to glorify God and help others draw near to Christ by providing free resources. Click here to learn more about God and here to access free Christian ebooks. Thanks for visiting. Stay blessed!

God Is For You

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Christians sometimes go through periods of loss or tragedy. In that time, some of us might ask “Why, God?” or start to think God has turned against us and is causing these terrible things to happen to us. Then, we become angry at God. With anger between us and the Lord, we will begin to feel distant and wonder how we can draw near to Christ. We can get closer to God by remembering the truth of God’s Word.

We all ask it. “Why, God?” The question sounds innocent enough (and sometimes we ask it with a pure heart). But if we really searched our hearts, we would find that most of the time we are really blaming God. By asking, we are insinuating it’s God’s fault for either making this horrible event happen (or letting it happen.)

Is God at fault? God’s way is perfect (Psalm 18:30) so He does not deserve our blame. God works everything that happens for our good. If you are in the regular habit of asking God why He allowed awful things to happen in your life, try to stop thinking “Why, God?” Instead, remind yourself that God is working everything together for your good.

Notice how God did not cause Job’s tragedies. Rather, Satan had launched a full-scale attack against Job! Christians must remember we are at war with evil forces. Satan and his demons still use a variety of tactics in modern day times. The enemy aims to discourage us, distance us from God, and turn some from Him completely.

Christians discuss the importance of faith in God all of the time. In the book of Job, we read about a time when God had faith in a man. In Job 1:8 God said of Job, “….There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil.” After Satan attacked, we read in Job 1:22 that “…Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing.”

I think God has faith in you. In fact, I believe He has said something wonderful about you. He is probably proud of the way you handled tragedy and held onto your faith. Consider the reward you have in heaven for overcoming this difficult time while still maintaining a strong love for God.

If we have allowed ourselves to blame God, we might also feel some anger toward Him. Whether you acknowledge anger at God or not, the Lord knows it exists. He loves you and does not want it getting in between you and Him. Anger must be dealt with, and it cannot be managed until it is acknowledged. Take a moment now to think of what lingering anger you have aimed at God.

  • Confess it. Lord, I confess I am angry at you for _______.
  • Ask forgiveness for it. Lord, please forgive me for my unjustified anger. I know You only desire what’s best for me.

It may take some time for deep anger to be completely released, but you are on your way to healing from that unrighteous anger. Try to remember to deal with anger at God as soon as it rises up within you. Never hide it. God knows how you feel, and He is eager to listen and forgive.

Hang in there! God loves you.

Lord, Thank You that You love us so much. Thank You for sending Your Son to die for us and sending Your Spirit to us so that we maintain a supernatural strength in times of loss and tragedy. We praise Your awesome Name. In Christ’s Name, Amen.

Click here to watch Chris Tomlin’s “Our God.” It is a great reminder that God is for you.

© 2015 Kim Bond

Draw Near exists to glorify God and help others draw near to Christ by providing free resources. Click here to learn more about God and here to access free Christian ebooks. Thanks for visiting. Stay blessed!